Queen of Rambles

I’m coming to you live from my new computer! You probably won’t notice a difference, but I sure do. I can’t find anything, the keyboard is laid out a bit differently and I can’t get all my e-mail addresses to work. But the screen is attached! I always hate getting a new computer set up. Thus far I am not a fan of Vista, either, mainly because I don’t know how to do anything with it.

Wasn’t that exciting?

The big news, of course, was that Erik had his first day of school. I only got one picture, and that was at home. They did not want us hanging around the school, so there wasn’t time for a picture coming or going. Booo!

As expected, Erik was thrilled to be at school and reported that it was lots of fun. He did have one complaint. When coming in from recess they are not allowed to jump, roll, or run down the hill. He was quite adament that he did not like that rule. I’m sure he didn’t.

I only talked to the teacher for one second. She said he had a great first day. I wanted to find out what they did and all that, but no one is telling me anything. Erik says they played with play-doh and played outside. That’s all he’s got. I’m sure there was a lot more to it, but I’ll probably never know unless I start volunteering out there.

And now it’s time for the big surprise! I’ve been holding out on you! I signed up for a blogger bingo that I didn’t realize was related to the infertility blog-o-sphere, so I haven’t been able to share my news. Well, I suppose I could have shared my news, but it would have been pretty ugly to make a big happy pregnancy announcement knowing that infertile strangers might be checking out my blog. It is bad enough that I have to tell this type of news to friends who really want kids and struggle to have them. At least they know me and know I wish the best for them.

So yes, after 18 months of trying and completely giving up, I was SHOCKED to find out I was pregnant. I don’t even know how it happened. Well. I know how it happened, but the timeline doesn’t make sense and we were not trying-trying anymore and it turned out to be a huge surprise. You know I love taking pregnancy tests. Peeing is so boring, I have to liven it up somehow. I was so sure that I couldn’t be pregnant this cycle that I didn’t even go out and buy a test until two weeks after my period was due. Usually I take a test five days before it is due.

According to my calculations I am 8 weeks pregnant with a due date of April 17. That was also my due date, so that’s a weird little coincidence. I haven’t been to a doctor yet because I’ve been in denial, so we’ll see what my official due date is when I finally get in to see someone.

Morning sickness has finally hit with a vengence. It started Saturday and has gotten progressively worse. Bah! I hope it goes away at the end of the first trimester instead of lasting the whole pregnancy. I knew what I was getting into when we started trying for a baby, but that doesn’t mean I have to enjoy feeling sick 24/7. Gag. This time I am smart enough to know that if I eat I will feel better, so I’ve been trying to eat even when I don’t think I can. It helps.

I finally got a doctor’s appointment, but it is not for another two weeks. I guess I should have called sooner. I didn’t realize it would be so hard to get in to be seen. Oh well. Not much they need to be doing now, though it would be nice to get confirmation of a heart beat. I believe I am currently at 8 weeks.

I am busting out of my clothes and it is making me mad. I shouldn’t be this big this early! I know it is fairly common in your second pregnancy, but it still makes me feel like a fat ass. Worse, though, is my shortness of breath. I’m just worried about how the rest of the pregnancy will go if I am already so short of breath! Plus, being short of breath reminds me of the time in my life when I was HUGE and depressed and inactive and was always short of breath because I was a cow. I realize I am short of breath because I’m growing a human and it is pressing on things, not because I’m a cow. It is just hard to tell my heart that.

I sure do like to complain, don’t I? I don’t want to get excited since so many things can still go wrong, but the physical symptoms are making it seem pretty real. Now, we just better hope it is a girl because if it is a boy we are going to have a battle royale over the name issue. I don’t know if we can handle the fight that will surely come. I am desperate to name a boy Kai and Mike says it is a pedophile name. Neither one of us wants to compromise.

PS If I missed something important in your journals this weekend, please let me know. I just couldn’t face going through all my FL and feeds. I don’t know why. Usually it is a pleasure, but I guess I was feeling a little anxious and cranky yesterday and today. Thankfully my big anxiety ball has been removed, leaving me with a hollow pit in my stomach caused by progesterone poisoning.

Well crap. I don’t have spell check on this browser. I guess I better get it installed tomorrow or no one will have a clue what I’m trying to say. I’m obtuse enough with weird typos and switching around of words. If only I liked to proofread, I might be a better blogger.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, September 9th, 2009 at 9:16 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.