News Flash: Hell is Frozen
Check your thermometers, sinners, because it’s time to bring out the ice skates! Hell has officially frozen over.
For the past two and a half years I’ve doing nothing but tell you about what an awful sleeper I birthed. He won’t sleep in the car. He won’t sleep at night. He won’t sleep if there is any noise. He won’t sleep if the mattress is too hard. HE WON’T SLEEP.
Today? He fell asleep in the car on our way to dinner.
That wasn’t noteworthy, though it was strange.
When we finally found a restaurant and pulled him out of the car, he screamed briefly than fell back asleep. We walked through the parking lot with a cold wind buffeting all around us, but he didn’t stir. We walked up and down a few different sets of little stairs. No movement. We sat down on a bench next to some loud talkers. Not a peep. I was beginning to think he was dead.
We finally were seated in a very crowded restaurant (think all-you-can-eat buffet at 5:30 pm with hordes of gray haired quilting ladies) and he didn’t move. Mike and I traded him back and forth a couple of times, we had people bussing dishes right next to us, people were coming to talk to us about him sleeping. . . nothing woke him up.
Finally after sitting at our table for over half an hour the boy woke up and he was not happy. There was much unpleasantness and everyone who encountered the boy was treated to a surly look that will be used to defend against evil alien overlords if we ever have a psychic war.
I guess a combination of fresh air, strange locations, swimming and a bad night’s sleep led to this unprecedented event.
So far the trip is going really well! I was scared to try to park at the quilting convention, so parked at the outlet mall about 1/4 mile from the place. It didn’t look too far until I started walking and it was up a major hill. My feetsies are sore! I saw some amazing quilts and spent too much money. I even saw a quilting celebrity! John Flynn! I don’t know if I like him or not, but I recognize his name so that was pretty handy. I bought a pre-cut Storm at Sea kit in batiks from his booth.
I’ll have to post full reviews of each location we visit when I get back. For now, let’s just say that so far everything we’ve been to has been over-priced and over-rated (except the quilt show). I am totally looking forward to Sunday when we get to see Margie! I am so silly that I still haven’t called her. I was going to call her this afternoon and ask if she and her family were up for an impromptu meeting but the second I walked in the door and looked at Mr. Yawny I knew it would be a bad idea. I’m getting antsy for our meet-up!
Now I want to rush downstairs and grab my purchases so I can roll around naked on the pretty, pretty fabric. That would require putting my pants on. Buffet lunch + snug jeans=must leave pants off all night.
Speaking of too tight pants. Mike took a picture of Erik sleeping in my arms at the restaurant. My god, have I chubbed out! First thing Monday I am OFF the sugar. No more winter doldrum sugar festivals for me. I’d like to scratch my eyes out (or knife my fat off), but I’m such a wuss I can’t stand the pain. And it wouldn’t work. Bah. I could write a whole big, long body rant but you’ve read it here before so I’ll spare you. Plus, my period is due any second now so we all know that sets me off more than anything.