Queen of Rambles

I am not meant to be a big city girl. The shopping and dining opportunities are lost on me. I’d enjoy the artsy fartsy aspects if I didn’t have to endure traffic and bag searches and millions of tourists. I could be quite content to live the small town life as long as there was a fat lady store nearby.

Today was a prime example of why I don’t want to live in a big city. One person can make a decision that effects hundred, perhaps thousands of people. One person can single handedly shut down a much needed people moving system. Other people moving systems will become overloaded. People will experience People Moving Rage. People might get hurt if the rage and impatience reach intolerable levels.

Someone stepped in front of an empty commuter train this afternoon, derailing that train and shutting down the tracks for the rest of the evening. Mike takes the commuter train, so our evening was shot since I had to go get him at the last metro station. The line of cars into the metro station parking lot was at least a mile long. The line of cars at a stand still on the highway coming out of the metro station was at least seven miles long, possibly longer. We only had to travel seven miles. Oh what fun! Happily MisterE slept for most the ride, but I’d really like to give the dead guy a piece of my mind. I suppose I should be sensitive and feel bad that someone was in so much pain that he’d step in front of a moving train, but I haven’t heard the full story and I don’t care. I am a selfish yuppy and I only care that I was greatly inconvienced and that my baby could have been killed. I’m always paranoid that my baby is going to be killed in a horrific car accident when I have to drive on the highway. It seems even more likely to happen when the roads are clogged with thousands of displaced commuters who just want to get home. Couldn’t this guy have taken some sleeping pills in the privacy of his own home? Did he really have to go out in such a dramatic and painful fashion? I am cold hearted.

I have not been having luck with highway driving this week.

Monday was Moms’ Night Out, which was actually pretty fun. There were ten of us, five social divas and five geeks. The social divas sat at one end of the table, sipping their martinis and cosmopolitans. They were trashed by the end of the evening. The geeks sat at the other end of the table, drinking water and diet coke. It was as if someone plunked a concrete wall right in the middle of the table. There was no interaction between the two groups. NONE. I’ll let you guess what group I belonged in. It’s not exactly a stretch. I didn’t even know there was a fashionable hairstyle this year. I thought it was a free-for-all. It was almost frightening to see the social divas, ranging in age from 23 to 42, all with the exact same hair style. The color varied but the length, part, and bangs did not.

We ate at a restaurant a few miles down the highway from our town. The geeks were not happy about this. One of the social diva sorority queens had picked the location. I’ll admit the food was good. Amazing in fact. I just had soup and salad, but it was the best soup and salad I’ve ever eaten in my life. The salad had goat cheese on it. Did you know goat cheese is good? I didn’t. I thought it was be goat like, but it really wasn’t (nerdy aside: My favorite Mexican restaurant here describes several dishes as being prepared with Chihuahua cheese and I always picture a little Chihuahua being milked. Then I giggle. Yes, I know it refers to a state in Mexico and not a small, yippy dog. I hope). I would totally eat there again, but not if I’m driving.

It was easy to find the restaurant because I had perfect mapquest directions. I just assumed I’d go back the same way, but I couldn’t find an on-ramp for the highway. I passed by the hospital where Erik had his MRI and thought I could find my way home from there, but I missed a turn. Suddenly I was on a road that I knew went to Germantown, even though I didn’t know if I was going the right direction. I followed it awhile, using my super spidey sense to insure I was going north (a really bad idea since I always think I’m going north). The road ended, so I had to make a turn on another highway that I recognized. Again I thought I was going north. This kept happening and I kept thinking I was going north, but suddenly I was back at the hospital. It’s amazing how you can go north for so long, yet still end up making a giant circle. I was lost for a good half hour and getting panicky. I decided to use my Costanza logic* and make a counter-intuitive turn. Success! I found the on ramp and came home and vowed to study a map of this area before I go traipsing off to social activities again.

This big city living is definitely not for me. I miss the days when traffic only came at a complete standstill when a herd of elk decided to cross the road or the drawbridge had to go up to let a little boat go by. I miss being unable to get lost because all the road names were in alphabetical order. I miss thinking a fifteen minute drive is f-o-r-e-v-e-r.

*Five points if you can tell the background to that gem

This entry was posted on Wednesday, April 19th, 2006 at 7:55 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.