Queen of Rambles

Mike has just informed me that I’m no longer allowed to take my birth control pills. I TOLD that doctor I needed something non-hormonal and he didn’t seem to believe me. I am so grouchy that I might just start beating the next person who looks cross-eyed at me. The other night I had to give the baby to Mike because I thought I might do something really bad if I held him for one more minute. I had a crying fit tonight because I didn’t want pork stroganoff for dinner.

Hormones. What are they good for?

Oh yeah. Not getting pregnant again. Dear Lord, I don’t want to get pregnant again. It’s way too hard.

Today is Erik’s seven week birthday and I guess he’s retarded. He still hasn’t found his hands, so I’ll have to resign myself to being the mother of the boy who just wanders around and head butts people. He has a freakishly strong neck. Maybe that’s to make up for his retardedness.

I’m joking, of course. I know babies develop in different ways. I just enjoy calling my child retarded because I’m a big, fat meanie who uses humor to disguise worry. I’m not worried, exactly.

But I might be soon.

In all reality, I’m the retarded one. Our bathroom doubles as our laundry room, so I often use the toilet seat as a temporary table. It doesn’t work as a table very well when the lid is open. Good thing we always flush around here.

It’s day four of Operation: Fat Banishment and the exercise portion has been going very well. I’ve managed 45 minutes on the elliptical every day, and have increased the calories burned every day. Too bad I am absolutely ravenous when I get done and stuff my face with every bad thing I can find. It almost feels like I am going insane. I guess it’s the breast feeding, but dang! I didn’t even know a person could be this hungry unless it was some sort of national or personal emergency. If I only had a scale I could motivate myself a little better (or beat myself up even better). I bought one a couple of years ago but it quit working even though I changed the batteries. Bastard. Maybe it would work if I made it a chocolate chip coffeecake. Since it doesn’t actually have a mouth I could eat it and be happy for ten minutes then cry for an hour. Sounds like my idea of fun!

I really need a new series to watch while I exercise. I used to watch Alias, but I just can’t take it any more. What series out there involves a lot of running and fighting? The rule is that I have to run when they run or fight. I always burned about 100 calories more during an Alias episode than during a Babylon 5 episode. They never run in Babylon 5.

I have to go do some real Mosiac Minds work while Mike has the baby. Too bad I have ZERO inspiration for my feature article.

This entry was posted on Thursday, December 1st, 2005 at 4:31 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.