Queen of Rambles

I’ve got an afternoon only job for tomorrow, so that will give me time to do all the wonderful things I need to do tomorrow. Namely, go find the head of AOHell and kick his ass. Or maybe I’ll just call my debt collector and have a nice chat about AOHell. I promised her I would. I thought I was a responsible adult. Why do I have my own personal debt collector? I’ve also got to call the bank and cancel a pending transaction that’s going to AOHell. Bastards bastards bastards.

Maybe I need to re-think my submission to the 30 book and write about the follies of youthful innocence and the evilness of telemarketers. Currently I have a tale of woe about the Great Crayon Incident of 2005 (or more properly, a long diatribe about not knowing what I want to do with my life).

We somehow managed to survive the Great Storm. We’ve had people calling from around the world to make sure we were ok. Would’ve thought three inches of snow would make the news in Sweden? I guess things are getting pretty bad farther north, but we sure didn’t get it. Even though it was a pretty pathetic storm, as far as storms go, we refused to go out and drive around with complete idiots who think they are in middle of Armageddon.

I’m getting really tired of sitting around growing a square cyclops eye. I swear computers must be a tool of the devil, even if they were the vehicle by which I found true love. I’m feeling a little stir crazy right now and should be reading, but I just can’t go away and leave rocket mania alone. Maybe if I went out into the wild world I would have a more interesting diary entry today. Instead, I will have to settle for regaling you with tales of granny and it’s just not nice to make fun of someone who’s in lots of pain and not doing well at all. But since when did that stop me?

Before our wedding she bought a full sized Tempur-Pedic bed so we’d have a comfy bed for our three week stay in her house. She’s insane like that. You don’t buy the thirty-three cent nasty chili to save money, then turn around and drop a thousand bucks on a bed that you don’t need and aren’t planning on using. And you certainly don’t drop the money on the most expensive bed you can find, when you could have gotten a perfectly good BIG bed for less. Two people in a full size? I know there are married couples who live that way, but Mike and I are old and cranky and we don’t like laying on top of each other when we’re trying to sleep.

Anyway, the whole point of the Tempur-Pedic beds seems to be the whole “comfort for a bad back” angle. Guess what! She know has an extremely bad back! Guess what! She’s still sleeping on her sofa. I just asked, I didn’t argue. I felt very proud that I was able to stay out of an argument about it with her. She had to explain though–if she was to sleep in the bed, she’d be waaaaaay in the back of the house and wouldn’t be able to JUMP up and RUN out the door if a burglar came in and tried to conk her on the head. Because, you know, she’s so going to be able to JUMP and RUN in her state. She can’t even stand up on her own. I managed to say, nicely, that she should just do whatever works for her, but it was hard.

I’ve come up with an idea for a novel. I think it would have to be an erotic novel, though, and I don’t think I could ever write something like that without giggling myself to death. I have no idea where this came from, but the story is just stuck in my head. I wonder if it’s been done before. It probably has. Anyway, the idea is that there’s a nun who’s slightly off her rocker, but only enough to give her a good dose of suspension of disbelief. Somehow a man sneaks into the convent and convinces her that he is God/Jesus and that they should have sex. So they do. Lots. And she is totally and utterly convinced she’s doing nothing wrong–she’s a bride of Jesus and worshipping her God. Then she gets pregnant and in trouble and things go from there. I think the guy would have to be a magician on the lam. He can do illusions, which is why he is able to convince her. It’s totally not the style of writing I ever do and I seriously doubt I will do anything more than write the idea here. Instead, I think I am going to go work on my mom’s quilt. I am having a hard time staying motivated with it because it is not a color or motif I care for, but I know she will love it so I keep at it. One of these days I may post a picture. If you’re lucky (or unlucky, according to your quilt picture preference).

This entry was posted on Sunday, January 23rd, 2005 at 5:36 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.