All the Pain, None of the Pleasure
I know this will sound perverse to many of you, but I love going to the dentist. I’ve been going to the same dentist since my very first trip and he’s a wonderful man. I’ve never seen the needle. I’ve never had a single dollop of pain. I have only had good times watching the goings-on through his glasses. My mom told my I shouldn’t do that because he’d think I was in love with him. I was 12 at the time.
Today I discovered I could make my mouth feel like I’ve just been to the dentist, but it was not joyful in the least. I remembered why I stopped using Kanka, a vile concoction of numbing agents designed to make you forget about the pain of a canker sore by putting such a nasty taste in your mouth that you spend the next four hours hurling into the toilet.
Ok, so I didn’t actually hurl. I just wanted to.
This stuff is seriously nasty, though. It makes your whole mouth go numb–your gums, your lips, your teeth, the back of your throat. You won’t be feeling a thing! I’ll probably have four new canker sores tomorrow because I kept biting my lip.
So, that was a thrilling entry. Should I leave it at that? I know you are all just thrilled to be kept up to date on my open wounds.
I went shopping today and didn’t spend a dime! And I got a lot of stuff! I love gift certificates. Actually, I started out by returning some junk that I bought for Christmas and then ended up not needing, so that was a bonus. Then I hit the fabric store and had the fabric cutting lady tell me I was spending too much money and if I would have only been there two weeks ago I would have saved some serious cash. I’m guessing she doesn’t work on commission.
I started my mom’s African quilt yesterday and quickly realized that I do NOT want to piece a whole queen sized quilt. Plus I have no where near enough fabric. Last summer I saw a cute little sampler quilt in Wal-Mart and decided to buy some fabric to make my mother a real quilt out of it, but at that point I had only made two quilts and had no idea what the hey-tang I was doing, how much fabric was required, or how to get a pattern. Getting the pattern was the easy part. I just posted about my plight on a quilting forum and someone sent me a copy (our local Wal-Mart was out of them). All that to say that I decided to buy another fabric with African animals and alternate big solid blocks of that in between my patch work blocks. Are you nodding off yet?
I am. Now I have to make a decision: unbearable pain while I brush my teeth or unbearable taste in my numb mouth for four hours? Tough call.