It’s after midnight and I’m on a rampage
I have had the MOST FRUSTRATING day EVER. Notice the gratuitous use of caps. Isn’t that annoying? If you find yourself annoyed, times it by about 1000 and you’ve almost reached my level of rage. If I was an impulsive person with no self-control my front yard would be littered with several things: an evil computer; a Satanic sewing machine; a gaggle of bobbins; a herd of CDs; a pile of fabric; and a big, fat, bleeding me.
It all started out so simply. I had an idea. For some strange reason I thought my idea was viable and set out to make it a reality. Why? I have no talent! Why why why?
So my idea? I want to make a quilted wall hanging using Swedish motifs. It sounds simple, except for the sad fact that Swedes never really got on the “quilts as art” bandwagon. I’ve scoured Swedish websites for the types of patterns I want, but they have nothing. NOTHING!
This is when a normal person would look at his or her quilting to do list and say “looks like I have enough projects to keep myself occupied for at least another millennia so I’ll forget about my brilliant plan.” Of course, things aren’t that simple when I’m involved. I decided I would make my own patterns. That’s right. MAKE MY OWN. Keep in mind I’ve been quilting for all of four months, I’ve done two paper pieced patterns and I am not artistic. Do you see where this is going?
First I decided to open up PageMaker and get my pattern going. The patterns are just straight lines, so PageMaker sounded perfect. Everyone else talks about using CAD but I don’t have that or know anything about it. That’s when I remembered the embarrassing truth about my PageMaker program: it doesn’t work. I wanted PageMaker. I cheered when I got PageMaker. I tried to install it, the disk kept freezing, I never had a real need for it, I forgot it, and it’s all kind of bad of me. I used to be the PageMaker queen! But when you have the dull life of merry-go-round monitor you don’t really have a lot of use for a desktop publishing program. Every time I put the disk in it totally freezes up my computer so I finally gave up.
Next option: Photoshop. I can do some things on Photoshop, but I’ve never tried drawing straight lines. Apparently drawing straight lines is not something graphics people do. Or if they do, they don’t call it that. I read tutorials that read like “Draw blah blah blahblahblah straight blah blah blah blah drag. . .” You get the idea. I tried for hours and thought I had lines, but they kept disappearing and I was really angry. Really. Angry.
But then I looked on another disk on a hunch and found a 30-day trial of PageMaker that I had forgotten about! The joy, the joy! I could have done a cartwheel!
Finding the disk and getting PageMaker on the computer was the bright point of my day. It still took me a couple of hours to make my Lucia pattern, but it was all fun. I still have the touch when it comes to PM. I was grouping things. I was locking things. I was drawing straight lines. I was stroking and filling. I was in heaven.
I printed out my pattern and started the process of actually sewing things together. It went well for about ten minutes, but then the next problem happened. My stupid computer kept clogging up. I changed bobbins. I changed bobbins again. I took it apart and removed the lint. I squirted oil into the oily places. I changed bobbins AGAIN. I really think the problem lies in the top thread. It lies on it’s side instead of standing straight up and I think it gets stuck. I’ve tried it several ways, and sometimes I can sew for hours but sometimes I can’t sew more than two stitches in a row. I was so mad that I was screaming out obscenities very loudly, which is something I never do. Well, except when I’m knitting or ripping out seams.
I finally gently removed the sewing machine from the top of my sewing cabinet (even though I wanted to pick it up and fling it to China) and popped out my Grandma’s old Singer. It’s old, but it works and it’s smooth.
I made several mistakes on my pattern and had to start all over. I finally got the simple part done and started on the complicated part when I realized that it was going to be absolutely impossible to complete the pattern. It just made no sense. I threw fabric all over the living room and went to pout.
Now it’s after midnight and after a long bout of pouting I think I’ve figured out a solution to my problem. It will require a lot more work and a lot of complexity, but if I get a fresh start tomorrow I should be able to do it.
Just be happy you weren’t around our house tonight. Mike just realized he can’t possibly win the video game he’s been playing for days on end. I was throwing seam rippers at the cat*. We are simply not pleasant.
On the upside, I think my dad is going to help me design my other Swedish quilt blocks. That’s pretty neat. He helped me with this one a little bit. He has a good eye for design and knows how to fit things together. He used to be a plumber, so he has to know how to put together puzzles. Wouldn’t it be hilarious if we ended up publishing a book together? What would his buds say if they saw his name on a quilting book? The thought cracks me up.
*I did not actually throw anything at the cat. I was taking artistic liberty there, but just wanted you to know that I would never abuse any of the animals. I did yell at her, but then gave her some kitty treats.
June 17th, 2004 at 3:39 am
Thanks for the disclaimer. You know the crazy cat lady from the east was recoiling in horror. ;)
June 17th, 2004 at 3:16 pm
Okay, I know all about getting frustrated with sewing. In fact, I rate the difficulty of a project by how many times I throw it against the wall. A 5 rates as pretty low on the frustration scale for me.
When you have machine problems you should remove the thread and bobbin and re-thread your machine and take the bobbin out of its case and put it back in and put it back together. Sometimes that’s all it takes. You may also find that using a brand new needle helps as well.
As for the thread lying sideways - I think I know the problem. Depending on the thread you’re using, most spools have some sort of notch or similar system to hold the thread end and stop it from unravelling. If you place this notched end to the right, away from the side where the thread feeds, the thread may not catch on it and get held up. Just a thought.
As for oiling, I usually oil after every project - it’s the last thing I do before shutting down the machine and going to bed. It gives the oil a chance to soak in and not get on your fabric or thread.
In any event, BRAVO to you for making your own pattern (I think kudos should always be in caps). I’ve been quilting on and off for 7 years and I still use some sort of pattern. I also think it’s hilarious that your dad helped you. But wait, is it hilarious that my hubby drafts clothing patterns for me….?